you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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