I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Randomize
