when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
