There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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