He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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