After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
