i permit you to call me
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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