I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
