Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
