This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
