It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
