Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
