if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
