lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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