so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I need to calm my uterus...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
