Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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