and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Randomize
