I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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