'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
