Im at strip club and am horny
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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