We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
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