If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
