I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
No stitches, just platelets and will power
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
