His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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