so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Randomize
