My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
the liver wants what the liver wants
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
