ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
