Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
