haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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