I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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