i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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