I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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