I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
