so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
