Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
