porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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