And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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