How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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