Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
we're making bets on your personal life
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
