i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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