How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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