this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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