I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
