i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
This baby is an asshole
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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