I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
