I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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