Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
