You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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