Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
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