The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
